New Aligned States
Founded by angry patriots, New Aligned States sought seccesion from the Union of the United States of America, due to their desire to no longer be a world empire, but instead, to return to the principles of their founding fathers. The people of NAS are hard tumultous people who have a great appreciation for music and the arts, among many other "simple pleasures". They are often referred to as the Nation of Beer, as the citizens of New Aligned States incorporate beer into their daily lives. The leader of this proud nation is High Chancellor: John Warbuck. The Unofficial History of New Aligned States The Early Beginnings of Beertopia: The story of New Aligned States is as much a story of tragedy as it is a story of hope and prosperity. Before the revolution, New Aligned States would be referred to as "Illinois" and was part of the United States federal government. After the terrorist attack on Mount Rushmore, the United States government began to repeal civil liberties in their crusade against terror. John Warbuck, a simple bartender who typically minded his own business, poured people their drinks, and planned to be married, had no idea the impact he would have on the fate of a nation. After his fiance was killed in the cross fire of a gunfight between US Homeland Security agents and a black listed "agent of corruption" who had supposedly said the president was a whore, John Warbuck went on his own crusade. The "agent of corruption" was shot on sight for voicing his disapproval with the president, and John Warbuck's fiance was dead simply for walking home that night. Neither of the victims were armed. That night, the cry for justice and independence was given a new voice. "Our own declaration of independence tells us we should do this after we have another beer," John Warbuck was known to say at underground rallies that were organized to declare Illinois's secession from the Union. Within months, Illinois had formed it's own volunteer army, and declared itself to be a Sovereign Nation, free from the United States Empire. For the United States, however, it wasn't that simple. The United States declared war on the new Sovereign Nation- Beertopia, with the message that they could only leave the Union in bodybags. Despite receiving gracious aid from Canada, the rebellion was crushed in almost every battle against the US forces, and they were pushed back to a barn in a city named Decatur. With low morale, a lack of food, and a harsh winter on it's way, all seemed lost for the new Beertopia. The Battle of the Barn The Battle of the Barn was the turning point in Beertopia's fight for freedom. The United States had figured that they were about to quell a rebellion- John Warbuck figured that it was time to make history. Having been outnumbered, out gunned and suffering great casualties, which included his only brother, Francis Warbuck, John Warbuck had to show his men that they could win a fight. The President of the United States, President John McCain had written surrender terms for Beertopia before the Battle, as he figured that the ensuing battle would be the final stand for Beertopia, and their demise. Within three days the Beertopians were pushed back and they retreated to a barn for their last stand, giving the Battle of the Barn it's name. The military had them on the ropes until their leader, John Warbuck gave an enthralling speech and the German Airforce began to provide support. Despite the air support not being enough to keep the United States Army from continuing their advance, John Warbuck gave a fierce battle cry, and after ammunition had been nearly depleted, found a sledgehammer on the side of the barn that he proceeded to beat over 150 people to death with. What is now known as "The Hammer of Freedom" was held high by John Warbuck after US forces withdrew from the battlefield, to chants of "You can't stop the hammer! Hail to the Hammer!" The same hammer is in display in the NAS capital's memorial museum. The United States was forced to retreat from the battle and President McCain with much hesitation, withdrew forces from the area to prepare for inevitable war with Mexico and China. On that very same day, John Warbuck headed back to what would later be named the city of Independence, to celebrate the Sovereignty of Beertopia. Citizens gathered around and celebrated at the amazing victory that Beertopia had accomplished under the leadership of John Warbuck. Story Behind the Nation Anthem It was 2 years prior to WWIII, the war that would split the world into over 30,000 countries in the aftermath to follow. New Aligned States was still fighting for their right to be their own governed body, and the fight was not going well. The majority of the rebels would mount their last stand on a farm in Decatur. Their fearless general, John Warbuck gave an enthralling battle speech and they marched onto the battlefield against the well trained United States army. After being pinned down from fire, it appeared as though all was lost, when suddenly, air support arrived from NAS's new ally, Germany. Although the air support greatly diminished the soldier count of the US forces on the battlefield, NAS was running low on ammo. It was then, that Gen. John Warbuck found a sledgehammer on the side of an abandoned barn and proceeded to order a full rush on the battlefield. After having blugeoned over 150 people to death, including the commanding US officer, he forced the United States to withdraw their forces from the fight. At the conclusion of the fight, John Warbuck held the hammer high into the sky for all his countrymen to view. They began chanting "HAMMER! HAMMER! You can't stop the HAMMER! HAIL TO THE HAMMER!" Due to wars that broke out with China and Mexico, the United States never returned to quell the rebellion of NAS, and they received their freedom officially when the United States was nuked to hell. The lyrics in the National Anthem represent the journey these patriots needed to partake in to earn their freedom, and never need to go into an aggressive war again. The lyrics are as follows: :Longing eyes turn into the sun :Low in the winter :Grey as a wolf now the wind has come :Cold as a hunter :Ride across the sky, thunder roll and lightning fly :Gone is the summer :What will keep us warm in the winter? :Tales of those who died, sword in hand in times gone by :Hail to the hammer, Hail to the hammer :Narrow eyes turn against the wind :Out from the ocean :Until the day when we sail again :Life is a long pain :Ride across the sky, thunder roll and lightning fly :Gone is the summer :What will keep us warm in the winter? :Tales of those who died, sword in hand in times gone by :Hail to the hammer, Hail to the hammer :To the god of thunder :The god that's protecting us all :All hail to the giant hunter :And hail to the forces of nature all :Ride across the sky, thunder roll and lightning fly :Gone is the summer :What will keep us warm in the winter? :Tales of those who died, sword in hand in times gone by :Hail to the hammer, Hail to the hammer, :Hail to the hammer, Hail to the hammer MTJi5ImbB7g World War III After the Battle of the Barn, Mexico and China declared war on the United States, and ignited World War III, which split the world into thousands of tiny countries. John Warbuck had taken all of his countrymen underground to weather out the nuclear fallout, and when it was safe to return to the surface, the other clans and factions aligned themselves with John Warbuck, and an official Constitution for New Aligned States was drafted, voted on, and passed. The new government was founded on the belief of free speech, personal rights, democracy, and beer. It was on August 25, 2008 at 3:48 PM that the Constitution was ratified, ushering in a new era of peace and prosperity. The Democratic Order The day NAS ratified their constitution, a message arrived for the new High Chancellor John Warbuck from Supreme Leader Mike of Communist Rigalia. The Supreme leader offered entrance into an alliance of nations called The Democratic Order. Due to their declaration of neutrality, this offer had appeal to John Warbuck and the people of NAS, but he tested and tried Supreme Leader Mike with a host of questions. After feeling that this new alliance had NAS's best interests at heart, the first act issued by the new NAS Senate, Parliament, and High Chancellorship was to join. The Democratic Order quickly saw how involved NAS was in their alliance, and how much they wanted to help out. Aid packages began arriving from Birgeland, Mecklenburg, Ciudad de Muerto, and other places. John Warbuck also arranged deals with larger nations to give them 200 infra, 200 land, 20 tech, and 400k in cash for a large sum of money. Combined with the aid received from The Democratic Order, these deals were quite effective in helping to build the infrastructure of the newly founded country. Quickly, trade gates opened, and NAS found themselves able to make their own beer, cars, steel, microchips, and asphalt, while learning how to clean radiation. The Era of Prosperity had finally come, and the approval ratings for John Warbuck skyrocketed. The Senator and Minister After twenty-four days in The Democratic Order, John Warbuck was made a Low Senator, giving him a voice for his country in the government of the great alliance they had joined. The very next week, he was elected Minister of Membership Orientation by the other nations in the order. John Warbuck, now serves in the High Senate of The Democratic Order and continues what he has always done before, to help The Democratic Order and its members. Over the first five months of NAS's existence, they had grown to 5399.99 infrastructure, 1,611.00 tech, and 29,692.270 Nation Strength. They continue to grow rapidly to this day. Much of this is owed to their friends in The Democratic Order and in repayment of such generosity, NAS has pledged to continue to help build smaller nations in the alliance and to come up with new ideas on how to teach and build these nations, for the glory of TDO. Long live John Warbuck. Long live his beer mug. And long live The Democratic Order!!! * John Warbuck is currently one of very proud few holders of the Democratic Badge of Honor. Chancellor of TDO After a long lived promise of hope and dreams, the leader of NAS became the TDO's next Chancellor, but all was eventually for not, as Mitch Daniels, one leading founder of TDO and prominent fellow High Senator, began a barage forcing John Warbuck to secede from The Democratic Order. After a long hard road of reaching the final goal, John Warbuck took his people for a better place but unknown on where to go, seeing that there was only one option. The Aqua Defense Initiative John Warbuck left TDO on September 15th and began forming a new alliance, one based on new principles, better ones than that of TDO, NAS along with serveral other nations of TDO began forming a charter. Within the next couple of days a charter was formed and an alliance was created called the Aqua Defense Initiative. With John Warbuck as its Acting Leader, they began all the processes of forming the government, appointing people until real elections can be held. With a new alliance and young government established, ADI was eventually placed under the Ragnablok Protectorate. Guaranteeing a future for the young alliance. Lord High Sentinel As John Warbuck began proceedig with growing the new alliance, he was appointed as its acting leader of Lord High Sentinel until proper elections could be held. In the meantime, John began conferring with his Lords in the government and began forming treaties and allies within the Aqua Sphere and Planet Bob. Within no time, ADI grew to 20 nations with a NS of 500,000, John Warbuck pleased at the result began a campaign to increase that to 1,000,000 NS within the next 3 months. Not long after on October 1st of 2009, John Warbuck of the New Aligned Sttes was officially elected as its first leaer of ADI of Lord High Sentinel. With that John Warbuck himself began conferring outside the government, always on the move to protect and grow this new alliance, it is only a matter of time until the goals of ADI all come to pass. The Culture of New Aligned States The people of New Aligned States love the arts, but their appreciation for music almost matches their fanaticism toward beer. They have currently named The Offspring as their National Band, and stadiums and sports arenas are packed any time the band returns to NAS for a tour. The Offspring's music, combined with plenty of beer, allows citizens to express themselves openly, as is such the nature of their government that allows the right to free speech and open expression of their ideas. On another front, Jon Lajoie is also a musical icon with his blend of "everyday normal humor" and upbeat tempo. Although not declared to be their national musical representative, he is practically worshipped. NAS citizens are extremely found of their beer. New Aligned States is not only the largest producer of beer in the world, but they are also the world's smallest exporter of beer. Although other forms of alcohol are generally acceptable to the people of NAS, beer is a must have at any sporting event, concert, movie, get together, or profession. If you attempt to take a NAS citizen's beer, prepare to lose an arm. Although NAS consumes most of the beer the nation manufactures, they have also become the larger beer importer in the world as well. John Warbuck Day October 13th is New Aligned States' John Warbuck Day, in celebration of John Warbuck's bravery and leadership during the Battle of the Barn. Every year, citizens break open kegs with sledgehammers as the symbolism of John Warbuck breaking the bonds that repressed the Beertopian. The explosion of beer that occurs when the keg is finally punctured is representative of the great number of freedoms that were restored to the people when they finally broke free from the United States. Typically the keg bashing ceremonies are followed by parades, public drunkenness and eventually, urination on public buildings. The NAS government spends approximately 2.6 million dollars per year just to clean up after the festival. A reported average of 126,491,388 dollars in profits is made on beer each John Warbuck Day. Wise investors typically buy stocks in beer around May, in anticipation of the spike in beer companies' profits. John Warbuck day has produced 138,214 millionaires to date. Constitution Day On August 25th, the people of NAS celebrate the day that their country ratified their own constitution, and officially became their own nation. The NASAF typically does stunt shows while the Navy participates in the annual Air & Water Show. John Warbuck is greeted with immense screams of joy as he addresses the nation on this day, and the people of NAS give him the same honor that they normally give on John Warbuck Day. It is also a tradition to invite speakers from other nations in The Democratic Order to speak and participate in the celebration due to the great and precious bond that NAS has with TDO and the closeness in time between the nation's creation and their induction into the great alliance. Past speakers have included Kev the Great, CabooseBlueArmy, Rychro Anrise (who was booed off stage for his anti-beer views) and RMarx. In much the same way as John Warbuck Day, Constitution Day is a huge day for the beer industry. Even though watching planes and ships go by tends to make the people of New Aligned States drink a little less, last year's celebration still gave the beer compaines a total of 98,327,481 in profits. Stock investors usually plan their investments a few months ahead of this day as well. The Beer Festivals In New Aligned States there are eight different beer festivals, all lasting four days. The festivals typically begin on a Thursday and will last through the weekend. The festivals are all in honor of a different kind of beer. They are, as follows: *Octoberfest *FestivAle *Pilsnerfest *Stoutival *Lagerfest *Hops Day *The March of Cider *John Warbuck Day John Warbuck Day and Hops Day are not dedicated to one particular type of beer, so the citizens of NAS typically choose whatever style of beer they please. Many claim that there is a typical baby boom that coincides with the beer festivals, due to the beer's effect on the average NAS citizen's libido. However, this is all speculative, seeing as there are eight different festivals and so it is hard to prove whether or not the festivals impact birth rate whatsoever. Public urination and drunkenness have now become so common during these festivals that John Warbuck has stopped trying to set up preventative measure or laws that would punish these acts. "Why did I give up trying to make a law to put public urinators and drunks in jail?" John Warbuck asks, ready to give the answer right away, "Because I'd have to lock up the whole damn country. Now if you'll excuse me, my beer is getting warm." The Government of New Aligned States The government of New Aligned States is modeled after the original government of the United States, but has it's differences as well. John Warbuck, knowing the level of respect that his people had for him, wanted to set up a government that would prevent him from abusing his influence and power. Therefore, checks and balances were created between the High Chancellor, the Parliament, and the Senate. There is also a Grand Judge who is appointed with approval from all three of the branches of government that makes sure to uphold the constitution and the laws. High Chancellor John Warbuck is the current High Chancellor of New Aligned States. The High Chancellor represents the executive branch of the government. Elections are held every four years, but the people may decide to demand the removal of a High Chancellor through a vote every year if they feel the High Chancellor they have is not doing a good job. The Prime Minister serves as a Secretary of State, and the second in command to the High Chancellor. The High Chancellor has a cabinet of Secretaries that carry out the day to day running of New Aligned States. Here is a view of the executive branch: High Chancellor * John Warbuck (Beer Party) Prime Minister *Richard Doctor (Beer Party) Secretary of Beer *Achilles Punks (Beer Party) Secretary of Finance *Ivanna Berish (Tea Party) Secretary of Defense *Donald Mezwitme (Beer Party) Secretary of Health *Doctor Melvin Gertzwitz (Beer Party) Secretary of Education *Anita Teechir (Tea Party) Secretary of Agriculture *John Michaelson (Beer Party) The Senate The Senate of New Aligned States is one of two bodies that make up the legislative branch of New Aligned States. Each district may elect a number of Senators that is dependent upon the population of that district. The Senate also elects a Senate President, who leads and organizes Senate proceedings and presents the legislation that the Senate has voted upon to the High Chancellor after having it pass a vote in the Parliament as well. There are currently 214 Senate seats in New Aligned States. The majority party is currently The Beer Party with 192 seats. The other parties with any real presence are The Tea Party and The Weed Party. However, the Senate is currently dominated by The Beer Party, and looks to remain that way for quite some time. Here is the breakdown of Senate seats: Senate President *Fredrick Bolson Beer Party *192 seats Tea Party *18 seats Weed Party *1 seat Other *3 seats Category:New Aligned States